Understanding life...
After a long year of resting of my writings (at least online sharing) finally I'm back writing on my blog...
There are many things I've learned in this past year and a half that I was not writing, many things to share, so I will start for few things that matters for me.
Will you be able to change your career to start over in some other field? Will you have the courage to leave a manager position to start something else as a recent graduated? Will you move and leave everything for a relationship or family?
During this year I had the opportunity to interview several candidates for several roles and positions, and the only thing I have to say is if you really listen them, you can not just understand them, but even you can learn from them.
I can write you pages and talk to you by hours about only one candidate's point of view about life or about his/hers decisions, but the goal of all that discussion would be, What did we learn from it?
Among those interviews I remember one particular moment that I will always keep in my mind; It was a +40 years old individual, sitting in front of me, totally harmless, with something in the eyes that was not right, as usual I asked all the questions by the book, but still there was something missing, I could feel it... I didn't mind the interview could last more than 1 hour (max time for interviews), I really wanted to know...
After talking for more than 50 minutes, the true came forward, I didn't need to force him, I just asked the right question in the right way hoping he will open, and he did... it was not an elaborated answer prepared at home to make himself a good candidate, the true was better than any possible answer and the expression in his eyes where the stamp that confirmed everything.
A good career path, everything planned, some things were good some not, got a manager position, finally the achievement aimed for many years but, as he mentioned to me, at the end he noticed he was risking a lot for that and he couldn't cope with it, salary was good, many travels, many responsibilities but also many hours in the office, many hours away from his house (house because it was not a home anymore), thinking that all that sacrifice done for those years will pay back and will finally enjoy with his family.
"Family, well hard to say a family now, I love my wife, but now we are more likely as flatmates" . There was not need to ask more, it was clear, so I changed the topic and asked about something else.
He knew what was happening, he knew what was he losing, what was he risking, but he knew it too late, when things were broken and seemed to be no way back; it was then when he saw a slight and tiny opportunity, "I want a wife again, and I want a home again".
This interview was one my first interviews last year, I recommended this candidate for the positions, although the chances to elect him were small because of a "expectations/experience mismatch". At the end we couldn't hire him for the position he was applying for... however a month later I saw one position where he can fit a bit better, and I knew I could convince the project manager to take him on board, and he did.
More than six months have passed, and ... he just bought a house because he is going to be a father next year, now he is stress with the moving and the pre baby activities, but as he told me once, "actually this is a good life" and then he said, "Got to go home"
Some people can Balance their work/personal life, some people can not, but you have to be strong enough to admit it and even stronger to take actions to change that.
Really, sometimes life is way easier, we are the ones that make it complicated.
There are many things I've learned in this past year and a half that I was not writing, many things to share, so I will start for few things that matters for me.
Will you be able to change your career to start over in some other field? Will you have the courage to leave a manager position to start something else as a recent graduated? Will you move and leave everything for a relationship or family?
During this year I had the opportunity to interview several candidates for several roles and positions, and the only thing I have to say is if you really listen them, you can not just understand them, but even you can learn from them.
I can write you pages and talk to you by hours about only one candidate's point of view about life or about his/hers decisions, but the goal of all that discussion would be, What did we learn from it?
Among those interviews I remember one particular moment that I will always keep in my mind; It was a +40 years old individual, sitting in front of me, totally harmless, with something in the eyes that was not right, as usual I asked all the questions by the book, but still there was something missing, I could feel it... I didn't mind the interview could last more than 1 hour (max time for interviews), I really wanted to know...
After talking for more than 50 minutes, the true came forward, I didn't need to force him, I just asked the right question in the right way hoping he will open, and he did... it was not an elaborated answer prepared at home to make himself a good candidate, the true was better than any possible answer and the expression in his eyes where the stamp that confirmed everything.
A good career path, everything planned, some things were good some not, got a manager position, finally the achievement aimed for many years but, as he mentioned to me, at the end he noticed he was risking a lot for that and he couldn't cope with it, salary was good, many travels, many responsibilities but also many hours in the office, many hours away from his house (house because it was not a home anymore), thinking that all that sacrifice done for those years will pay back and will finally enjoy with his family.
"Family, well hard to say a family now, I love my wife, but now we are more likely as flatmates" . There was not need to ask more, it was clear, so I changed the topic and asked about something else.
He knew what was happening, he knew what was he losing, what was he risking, but he knew it too late, when things were broken and seemed to be no way back; it was then when he saw a slight and tiny opportunity, "I want a wife again, and I want a home again".
This interview was one my first interviews last year, I recommended this candidate for the positions, although the chances to elect him were small because of a "expectations/experience mismatch". At the end we couldn't hire him for the position he was applying for... however a month later I saw one position where he can fit a bit better, and I knew I could convince the project manager to take him on board, and he did.
More than six months have passed, and ... he just bought a house because he is going to be a father next year, now he is stress with the moving and the pre baby activities, but as he told me once, "actually this is a good life" and then he said, "Got to go home"
Some people can Balance their work/personal life, some people can not, but you have to be strong enough to admit it and even stronger to take actions to change that.
Really, sometimes life is way easier, we are the ones that make it complicated.
1 comment:
"Really, sometimes life is way easier, we are the ones that make it complicated."
You have an attractive-interesting way telling your stories. I would love to see you back.
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